Let No Man Despise Thy Youth pt 1
You can either fight and bully people into respecting you or you can earn their respect by making a few adjustments. If you chose the later then this post is for you. Here are a few factors that will bring the result that you desire.
People often rate what level of respect to accord you based on their perception of who you are, and their perception is dependent on your presentation. In life, you don't always have a second chance to make a first time impression. Therefore, if you want to command respect then you must begin by ensuring that your presentation is not giving you out.
My idea of the concept 'respect is reciprocal' is this, if I respect myself and treat myself with value, dignity and honour others will have no choice but to do the same. How people treat you is your responsibility. The price tag you put on yourself will determine how people price you.
The level of respect people will give to you is determined by the level of respect you give to yourself. If you go around despising yourself and treating yourself like a nonentity, asking people to respect you is a waste of time.
No one can despise you if you don't give them the chance to do that and no one can respect you beyond your predetermined threshold.
Respect is not given, it is earned and the process of earning respect begins by understanding that you are responsible for the way people treat you.
A quick disclaimer; every now and then you will come in contact with people with nasty attitudes, people who will do everything in their power to despise and treat you badly. It doesn't matter how much you respect yourself around such people, they are not able to see value in others because they don't see value in their own self. They are often blinded by hate, anger or even lack of mental transformation. Your goal is to understand their limitations and reduce your interaction with them as much as you can.
However, this doesn't change the fact that the way you treat yourself is what determines how people treat you generally. I dealt extensively on the concept of responsibility in my first book (GROW UP PART 1 VOLUME 1: The Concept of Responsibility) you might want to get it to further understand how to deploy this ability that is inherent in every human being. There are things you must incorporate into your life in other to command the respect that you deserve. Some of these points are basic, while others require time and a more coordinated approach.
To desire to be respected is not inaccurate. Being respected creates a welcoming environment for work and family. It creates a comfortable environment where you can work and thrive. This is contrary to what is obtainable in most places.
There are people that have concluded that anyone who desires to be respected is a victim of inferiority complex. They either label such people as being demanding or proud. But this is not true. Being respected satisfies a need that is embedded in every human being and it t is okay to feel the need to satisfy that inherent desire. However, having the desire to be respected alone will only lead to an entitlement mentality if the other factors are not incorporated.
HOW TO COMMAND RESPECT
1. Dressing and appearance: The first way to command respect is in your dressing and appearance. it has been said that the way you dress is the way you will be addressed. When people come in contact with you the first thing they see is your dressing, and this informs their perception about you. Every dressing sends a message. This explains why professionals dress in a certain way and when you see one you immediately know what to expect.
How you dress is the first impression that you give to people. You need to ask yourself, what do people think of you when they come in contact with you? You might say you don't care what people think about you. After all it is your life and no one has a right to dictate to you what you wear or how you look.
It is true, no one has a right to dictate to you about how you look. But you see, this is what this blog is all about "helping people transit holistically into adulthood". You need to understand that though life is about you, it is not always about you, and the best part of life is a life lived with posterity and and conscience in view.
Earning the respect of those around you is important to your mental health, to your children, your spouse and even to your finances. One cardinal point about business is not being easily replaced. If people don't respect you they will easily seek for alternatives to you. Therefore, it is important to look good and as I will always say "looking good is good business".
I am not talking about "packaging" or dressing to impress people. Most people borrow clothes and even buy clothes and shoes on credit just to show off. Some expose vital parts of their body all in a bid to impress people. That is not the point here. You don't have to dress in a flamboyant way or show sensitive parts of your body to look good. Looking good is the product of having a sense of colours and managing your clothes properly no matter how cheap you bought them. It has to do with managing your hair, washing all your pits when you bathe and if you are able to get a cologne, body spray or perfume it will increase your rating.
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